Happy day after Halloween people! How are your cavities coming? Quite nicely I hope.
This past weekend was the most joyous time of year for Lauralikey. That would be me. Costumes, chocolate and turning another year older all mixed in with alcohol is what I call a recipe for magnificence. Sure, when reading those ingredients your first thought is not our beloved holiday but some kind of sexy soiree, but you’re wrong. They will be reused for that purpose as well, but we’re talking about Halloween and my day of birth.
I have enclosed pictures of my jack-o-lanterns from this year. Ok, last year too. Why? Because they took me f**king forever to complete. I’m serious about pumpkins like I’m serious about breathing. They’re both essential for my existence. That’s how hardcore I am. I would reenact scenes from The Walking Dead if I could but I can’t afford the fees those makeup artists charge. Damn makeup people.
On my day of birth I sipped champagne (pronounced sham-pan-ye, not cham-pain. Just cuz) and mingled with ghouls and sluts galore. Seriously, screw you slutty girls. You have no sense of imagination. You can harlet yourself up any other day of the year to get grinded up on the dancefloor. At least try to save your dignity one day of the year with an ounce of creativity. A few of my friends and I went as one of our childhood babysitters. You know that Nintendo ruled your life back then. It ruled it more than your parents did. Oh Tetris, you rocked my world.
Oh, and yes that is a Robert Pattinson pumpkin face, I did it myself thank you. gotta love celebrity pumpkins! I’d also like to thank Dustin Milligan for being super fantabulous and tweeting us today!